Michelle on Josie's Progress

[Arete]

Yeah, now I think it was a language/culture issue with Marianne. Not like I was giving other people that pious lecture a few threads ago, and then turned around and did not consider language/culture issues in her post.

I'm sorry, Marianne. :embarrassed:

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

Marianne, sorry if you felt attacked! I think I went on this tangent because I was also reacting to the wording of your post, which I now see was a language/culture issue and you weren't judging.

[France Nolan]

My apologies, Marianne. I got my hackles raised for no reason. Sorry!

[Evilbad]

I actually kind of feel like this is a case of "A duggar said it, therefore we must mock", because its really just basic common sense to teach kids with food allergies from an early age that they can't eat it, or siblings that they can't have it.

Plenty of other stuff to mock, I think ya'll are reaching here.

[Miranda]

Not speaking to the subject of food allergies or intolerance, but the "Others may, but I may not" just sounds like part of the Gothard brainwashing to me. I think they've conditioned their children from a very young age to not want or make them think they don't want the same things that they see others around them doing or having, whatever that may be, that doesn't fit into their worldview. And for Josie, I think the lactose issue is just another way to work that idea in. Of course she needs to be taught to make food choices keeping in mind her dietary requirements and it's good that the other kids in the household are aware of her needs. But coming from the Duggars, knowing their beliefs and practices, "Others may, but I may not" seems like it goes a whole lot deeper than food restrictions. And if they're withholding dairy alternatives from he while she sees a houseful of siblings enjoying something she would like to eat, that's just cruel.

[Marianne]

I do not think you have to apologize ! It was "just" a mutual misunderstanding, the joy of the internet !

[MrMattyMatt]

All of these "parentables" are stupid, useless and not even a bit interesting. Does she really even "write" them??

[OkToBeTakei]

Re the practicing "Others may have it, but I may not": I think that in Duggarland this is being made into an obedience issue rather than a health one. "Others may have it, but I may not" sounds submissive; "I'm allergic to milk products" sounds assertive.

As a small child, I had many allergies (most of which I've outgrown), but, even in the '50s, with a decidedly NOT lenient mother, I remember telling a friend's mother I was allergic to tomatoes, and she made me a dish of pasta without them.

Re what OKtobeTakei said above: When I was dating my future second husband, he and his kids were at my apartment one day. His four-year-old came running to tell me that my four-year-old had "snookted strawberries" out of the fridge. I quickly told him, "This is her house, and she has the right to have a snack if she's hungry. Would you like some, too?" I guess his mother had very different rules. I also kept a bowl of fruit like apples, pears, and bananas on the kitchen table for anyone who wanted any.

I think you may be misunderstanding. It's not that I am ever going to say no and it is absolutely not in any way about food. It's just polite. Sure it's her home and we are very relaxed in all things, it takes a nanosecond to say, just as thanking my partner for a bog standard cup of coffee he makes, takes a nanosecond, or saying thanks for a lovely dinner as I do to my Mother on Sundays when we go.

Another important point about snacking I notice nobody has mentioned. No. I don't always eat snacks because I am hungry. I sometimes have a snack because I bloody just want one :lol: If I'm hungry I eat food. If I want chocolate I eat chocolate. Why are kids any different? Sure kids should eat when they are hungry, but they also need to know the difference between hunger and want. ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with a good old treat for the sheer fact it tastes good. Nothing wrong with that. As my very little niece once told me. Kids have a separate tummy for sweets :lol:

[OkToBeTakei]

I do not think you have to apologize ! It was "just" a mutual misunderstanding, the joy of the internet !

Happens all the time. Communication is good. Other's experiences make us grow.

Regarding your roommates kids. To cheer you up my 2 yr old once had an epic tantrum at the Supermarket. Because, I would not buy her the colourful box of err tampons she liked 8-)

[twinmama]

Maybe this is why Josie still walks around drinking bottles of pediasure and the like. Much easier to give her a meal in a bottle than try and figure out what she can tolerate with her dairy sensitivities.

I have no idea why she drinks Pediasure, but I have preemies who had very minor eating issues due to their prematurity (MONSTER reflux) so I have read a lot about preemie eating issues. Josie could be having Pediasure to supplement her diet if she isn't on the growth charts for her actual age and/or got failure to thrive. Plus she was intubated presumably for a long time and that can give kids some severe oral aversion and eating issues way past Josie's age. So if she won't eat certain items or textures, Pediasure can give her the nutrients she's missing. If any of this is the case, I hope she is seeing an OT or ST and we just haven't heard about it.

Or the Duggars could just be lazy.

[Marianne]

Happens all the time. Communication is good. Other's experiences make us grow.

Regarding your roommates kids. To cheer you up my 2 yr old once had an epic tantrum at the Supermarket. Because, I would not buy her the colourful box of err tampons she liked 8-)

Here is candy. They are right next to the cash desk. Who had the idea to put them there ? Each time it's "I want candy" (there are already a lot of "dragibus" at home, they are my drug. Blue dragibus, I love you). It is demonic, candy next to the cash desk :lol: !

[Dandruff]

I'm also very lactose intolerant, use lactose-free milk and ice cream, but yogurt is OK. I have lactase tablets for when I'm having more than a very small amount of lactose otherwise. I've found that the brand works well for me but the generics don't. I'd obviously rather pay less for the generics, but it didn't come out cheaper when I was consistently taking 2-3 times as many.

I had food allergies as a child (and even more now) and remember often feeling like the odd one out at birthday parties. It's hard to have to always be careful and watch others eating things you wish you could have. I hope Josie's feelings are being taken into account.

[AuntCloud]

Marianne, chiming in with an apology - I see where you're coming from, I'm sorry for getting up on my high horse.

[Rescinded and Mended]

I recall an episode where Johannah put a yogurt in front of Josie to snack on and I bet this was way after they found out about her dairy issues.

I call BS on this latest parentable.

Good eye, freealljs. Does anyone know which episode this was? I'd love to know what brand of yogurt it was and if it was dairy-free or not.

[ElphabaGalinda]

Although she spelled Jordyn wrong, I'm surprised she even knew there was a Jordyn. Someone probably told her there was a Jordyn when she asked. Also if you're teaching Josie to say anything at all (and I highly doubt Michelle is teaching her anything) why not teach her to say she can't eat dairy so other people understand. I would be shocked if Michelle actually wrote the parantables and even more shocked if she did anythign in them.

[Coconut Flan]

I agree it was a situation from some time ago that Michelle or the ghost writer dragged up to fill a column. Josie has been seen eating dairy products quite often in episodes filmed after she turned maybe 2.

[freejugar]

You know, what really bothers me is that toddlers, and pre-schoolers are allowed to have free range to the snack fridge.

Little kids are not known for choosing wisely. I see this as an example of how lax Mullet is in running her home.

on top of it being unhealthy, it's probably pretty expensive too (compared to having an actual meal)

[EyeQueue]

OK, this is off topic, but: OKToBeTakei, could you kindly post some pictures of or info about "cheeky wee cheese"? :D I'd certainly like to try some!

[OkToBeTakei]

OK, this is off topic, but: OKToBeTakei, could you kindly post some pictures of or info about "cheeky wee cheese"? :D I'd certainly like to try some!

Aww sorry, another cultural/colloquial difference/thing.. A cheeky wee....is just a phrase like, OH I think I'll just have myself a cheeky wee gin and tonic before dinner. Sorry :lol:

For what it's worth I like oatcakes, Carr's water biscuits, any type of flatbreads, and my favourite cheeses are Stilton, Wensleydale, brie, actually just insert cheese, I'll eat it. Child and I discovered this amazing west country cheddar with carraway seeds a few weeks ago DrooooooL. I know good cheese should be served at room temp but, I seriously just like mine cold.

[dilannsmom]

Holy shit :lol: I bet like me, you and your Mum just stood and watched. Manners are so funny. It is a rude thing to do but even ruder to stop a guest per se :lol:

I mean it's not like when you have kids or guests over you are not going to offer them something anyway.

Saying that there is a joke in Scotland about the stereotypical meanness. When you arrive at somebodies house they will say 'You'll have had yer dinner! (lunch,breakfast) :lol:

I think the degree of rudeness has to do with how close a friend it is. I will never forget when my mom got out of the shower one afternoon when I was in high school and she heard noise downstairs in the kitchen. Assuming I was home she wrapped herself in a towel, lumbered down the stairs to say "hi" and was astounded when my bro's best friend was standing in the kitchen with the Doritos from the chip drawer cracking open a Pepsi. He and my brother had been best friends since 3rd grade--my parents and his parents pretty much had "shared custody" of both boys. It's just the way things were. So, when my mom saw Jesse with his hands in the snack drawer she tucked her towel tighter, asked if he had homework, and then went back to the bathroom to dry her hair.

My daughter has a group of dance girls that she has been friends with for 4 years. During the summer they spend the night at our house at least once a week. I am more than happy that they make themselves at home as it means I don't need to get up every 15 minutes to make them a snack.

At my house I don't care that the friends make themselves at home--I'd rather my daughter and her friends hang at my house where I know what they are doing...so if relaxing some rules is what it takes for that to happen I'm ok with tween girls in the fridge of their own accord.

[EyeQueue]

Aww sorry, another cultural/colloquial difference/thing.. A cheeky wee....is just a phrase like, OH I think I'll just have myself a cheeky wee gin and tonic before dinner. Sorry :lol:

For what it's worth I like oatcakes, Carr's water biscuits, any type of flatbreads, and my favourite cheeses are Stilton, Wensleydale, brie, actually just insert cheese, I'll eat it. Child and I discovered this amazing west country cheddar with carraway seeds a few weeks ago DrooooooL. I know good cheese should be served at room temp but, I seriously just like mine cold.

No apologies necessary! :D I thought it might have been referring to those fancy individually-waxed gouda wheels or something. Thanks for the clarification. :D I'll have to look for Wensleydale--I don't recall ever having that.

I like Carr's water biscuits, too, and also the whole wheat ones. They're quite yummy.

[OkToBeTakei]

No apologies necessary! :D I thought it might have been referring to those fancy individually-waxed gouda wheels or something. Thanks for the clarification. :D I'll have to look for Wensleydale--I don't recall ever having that.

I like Carr's water biscuits, too, and also the whole wheat ones. They're quite yummy.

VERY yummy.

Wensleydale. Beloved by Wallace and Gromit :D

[FreeJosie]

That "parentable" of Michelle's just highlights how tuned out she is - Jordyn is supervising Josie in the kitchen and their mother only reacts when she hears a "commotion." What if Josie were in there by herself, grabbed a yogurt, and became ill from eating it? Pay attention, Michelle.

ETA: Just read through the thread - I don't watch the Duggars regularly, so if it's true that Josie does eat dairy products on the show, then disregard my post. Not a shock that Michelle would make something up for a column either.

[outrunningzombies]

I agree with the other posters regarding food allergies and intolerances. My three year old son has multiple severe food allergies and we have really pushed for him to be able to self-advocate regarding what foods he can and cannot eat. His older sister understands as well. I also agree with the posters who made the comments about having dairy alternatives. It doesn't seem fair to keep "off limit" snacks in the house and not have a suitable alternative for Josie.

[FJismyheadship]

To the PP who mentioned their neice having seperate tummies for sweets

I did that when I was little. I hated green beans. Still do, although I learned its when its from a can, cause I had some whole ones grilled one time and they were good. Anyways, I was told I couldn't have desert if I didn't eat my green beans, so I would manage to get ONE down, and then say "My tummy is seperated into compartments and the green bean part is full. The dessert part is empty.

It made sense to me at the time.