When fundies self diagnose / Narcissism thy name is Lori

[lilwriter85]

I do want to say that I'm not looks snarking at all. Both young women are quite pretty with or without premature aging. And it IS surprising that she doesn't go on about staying youthful -- there are plenty of ways to keep yourself younger-looking even if you're on a really tight budget (like most of her readers seem to be). Maybe aging doesn't matter so much in Lori-world.

As for undisciplined kids, Lori, please. Most of the kids I know are fairly well-mannered and pleasant to be around (including my own, tyvm).

It could be that. Part of the reason, I wondered about why Lori never talks about aging or trying slow down aging, is because she has constantly brought up weight in regards to women looking good for their husbands. It could be that in Lori world, being thin is more important that aging.

[dairyfreelife]

It could be that. Part of the reason, I wondered about why Lori never talks about aging or trying slow down aging, is because she has constantly brought up weight in regards to women looking good for their husbands. It could be that in Lori world, being thin is more important that aging.

I'm going to guess that's because ageing can't be controlled? Weight can change, go up or down, but you can never be younger. Not agreeing with Lori, just can see why age wouldn't be an issue but weight could be in a person who loves control. There's not a medicine or herb or anything that exists that stops a person from growing older and eventually dying. So, stick to things that can actually be controlled in some way.

[FundieFarmer]

I'd bet it's because aging means you're becoming a wise woman of the Lord, which means you can (dun dun DUN)...mentor younger women! (which is, of course, teh gawdliezt calling).

[polecat]

I'm going to guess that's because ageing can't be controlled? Weight can change, go up or down, but you can never be younger. Not agreeing with Lori, just can see why age wouldn't be an issue but weight could be in a person who loves control. There's not a medicine or herb or anything that exists that stops a person from growing older and eventually dying. So, stick to things that can actually be controlled in some way.

Sadly, weight can't always be controlled either. But I suppose that's more than Lori's little mind could comprehend.

[dairyfreelife]

Sadly, weight can't always be controlled either. But I suppose that's more than Lori's little mind could comprehend.

Well, it can go up and down whilst age only goes up. I think she's just picking things that have a chance of being in her control. Doesn't mean they always are, but in her mind it's controllable. People gain weight. People lose weight. Therefore, weight can always be controlled in her mind so she will control it.

[Hisey]

I think she focuses on weight because she is thin.

I think she avoids discussion of wrinkles because she has terrible skin. Look at the picture of her in the dress. She looks older than her age and there is sun damage on her face and legs. That must be what happens when you live in So Cal all your life and do not wear sunblock because of "chemicals."

[lilwriter85]

This is from the woman who stayed at home and had a nanny who probably also did housekeeping for Queen Lori.

Many are growing up to feel entitled today; entitled to free things without working for them. Yes, there is a place to help those who can't help themselves but there are WAY too many who are getting things for free and are able to work. Many out of work, don't even look for work. God calls us to work, period. How about you? Is your home always a mess, do your children sit around all day playing video games and watching television or is your home a hard-working productive home?

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men.

Colossians 3:23

The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied. Proverbs 13:4

If anyone is not willing to work, let him not eat. For we hear that some among you walk in idleness, not busy at work, but busybodies. Now such persons we command and encourage in the Lord Jesus Christ to do their work quietly and to earn their own living. 2 Thessalonians 3:10-12

You NEED to be busy at home. Your time shouldn't be spent idly doing nothing productive. Of course, if all your work is done or you are exhausted and need a break, take a break but if your home is in disarray and your children are not getting their work done, get to work! Train your children to be hard workers, not expecting hand-outs when they grow up.

As soon as they are toddling, have them help you do some easy things. This is when they are most willing to help. Use this time wisely and they will grow up enjoying work. Sing while you work and never make it seem like drudgery. Thank and praise the Lord for work. Appreciate your husband often for working hard and providing a living for your family. If you struggle with this area, look up all the Bible verses about work, type them out and begin memorizing them. Memorize the verses about discipline and self-control also since we are transformed by renewing our minds with God's Truth as His Spirit works mightily within us.

And whatever you do, do it ALL to God's glory! Don't do a sloppy job making your bed. Teach your children to make their beds neatly, also! Make them as neat as you can. When you clean the kitchen, do it with all your might and make it shine. While you cook, make the most yummy, nutritious meals that you know how so your family will love healthy food. We are here for the purpose of glorifying God and He wants us to do our best, just as we want our children to do their best.

One woman just commented this on one of my posts about a cluttered home, "My mother had to work full-time and be a wife and mother of four. Our house wasn't the cleanest, nor the dirtiest... It's too much for a woman to work and raise children. Looking back, Mom was under way too much stress and noise. We had clutter issues. Clutter is crazy making, and I truly believe, the clutter got to her and that's why she would yell. Us brats are all on our own, and Mom - now widowed - has a quiet, clutter-free space of her own."

Hopefully, you won't have to wait until you're old and widowed to have a clean and tidy home. This is why mothers NEED to be home, if at all possible. Their work should be in the home; keeping it clean and tidy, fixing healthy meals, training the children to help and making a sanctuary for their husband so they can have a productive home!

[lilwriter85]

I think she focuses on weight because she is thin.

I think she avoids discussion of wrinkles because she has terrible skin. Look at the picture of her in the dress. She looks older than her age and there is sun damage on her face and legs. That must be what happens when you live in So Cal all your life and do not wear sunblock because of "chemicals."

Yup to this. I've seen some blogs usually fashion and beauty bloggers who are always promoting methods of keeping your skin healthy and trying to slow down the aging process. I agree, Lori doesn't have good skin. I know women around the same age as her. These women do have wrinkles, but not as bad as Lori.

[Fascinated]

That's awesome. I like a clean uncluttered home, too, but I certainly don't put that much thought or purpose into it. I mean, I get it done (and then I 'just sit around all day' on FJ mostly), and move on. I feel very sorry for these women.

I love the commenter who freely admits she and her siblings were brats, but claims that the reason their mother would yell was due to clutter. No, nothing to do with bratty kids at all. Women are only happy, kind mothers if they are cheerfully and thoroughly cleaning the house for their lord. Ok.

[polecat]

Yup to this. I've seen some blogs usually fashion and beauty bloggers who are always promoting methods of keeping your skin healthy and trying to slow down the aging process. I agree, Lori doesn't have good skin. I know women around the same age as her. These women do have wrinkles, but not as bad as Lori.

Aging is inevitable, but lifestyle, sun exposure and genetics can really speed the process. I'm horrible about putting lotions and creams and things like that on my face, but I always, always wear sunscreen because I have ridiculously fair skin. Lori looks like she has skin that tans, so I could easily see her and her kids skipping the sunscreen because hey, they don't actually burn AND bad, bad chemicals (Lori, you've heard of sunblock, right? Without bad, bad man-made chemicals? Or heck, woman, use a hat!).

[Koala]

This from a woman who is too lazy/doesn't have the wherewithal to pick up her purse and walk out of the house when her neighborhood's on fire. Work indeed :roll:

[2xx1xy1JD]

Let me get this straight:

Lori had a huge issue with me, because I posted polite comments that nevertheless disagreed with her teachings and persisted in opposing the whole "husband has the final say" thing.

Ken and Lori also felt that I somehow betrayed them by posting comments about them elsewhere (ie. here).

On Sunday, Lori did a "bash Sheila" post. While she didn't mention Sheila by name this time (she has allowed anti-Sheila comments by Ken and Cabinetman in the past), it takes 3 sec. on google to discover that the comment she's quoting came from this post on To Love, Honor and Vacuum: tolovehonorandvacuum.com/2014/08/mark-driscoll-mess-tells-us-marriage/

Reading through, Lori posts a lot of comments, trying to get in the last word after Sheila basically says, "well, you and I disagree." She tries to post politely, then keeps posting on and on, then seems to give up in a huff and decides to bitch about Sheila on her blog instead.

Pot, meet kettle. Tell me again what was so wrong about my posting?

BTW, Sheila's thread was a nice summary of everything I dislike about Lori's marriage advice and everything that I like about Sheila's POV.

[love2scrap]

2xx1xy1JD, was that your quote in Lori's post on authority turning abusive? i agree with you fully. Lori is full of shit. And now reading through the argument on sheila's blog, i'm not convinced it was lori in the comments. I'm certain Ken wrote some of the responses. Not saying he is by any means a smart person, but the articulation is way too complex for Lori's usual simple minded style...

[2xx1xy1JD]

2xx1xy1JD, was that your quote in Lori's post on authority turning abusive? i agree with you fully. Lori is full of shit. And now reading through the argument on sheila's blog, i'm not convinced it was lori in the comments. I'm certain Ken wrote some of the responses. Not saying he is by any means a smart person, but the articulation is way too complex for Lori's usual simple minded style...

No, it wasn't my quote. I just took a section of the quote and googled it, and it took my straight to Sheila's blog.

On the comments for the Aug. 28, 2014 post, I am certain that the wall-of-text comments from "Lori" under comment #2 are Ken. The sheer length, the way he pretends to agree with her while actually disagreeing with everything,, the "I have no issue with..." line, the "we must live in two different worlds" line, the "this will be my last comment" line (followed by many more comments, of course), the reference to "exceptions", and the throwing out of random numbers - it's got all of Ken's fingerprints. So does the reference to trusting the husband, which is supposed to promote intimacy. That's a pure Ken line. Oh, and then we have a line about the "fleshy" tools of conflict resolution. Again, totally Ken.

[polecat]

2xx1xy1JD, was that your quote in Lori's post on authority turning abusive? i agree with you fully. Lori is full of shit. And now reading through the argument on sheila's blog, i'm not convinced it was lori in the comments. I'm certain Ken wrote some of the responses. Not saying he is by any means a smart person, but the articulation is way too complex for Lori's usual simple minded style...

I guess neither of them have ever heard, "Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely."

Well of course they haven't. They're both as dumb as a box of feathers.

[lilwriter85]

I was annoyed with Lori's posting. She fangirls over the Willis family.

The Willis Family has a new television show on TLC right after the Duggar's show. This family has twelve children. The father comes from a very large family and lost six of his siblings in a fiery car crash when he was younger. They show the church with the six white coffins in it. I can't imagine losing and trying to get over losing six children.

Both he and his wife came from large families so they decided to have twelve children before they were married! They bought a 100-year old home in Tennessee out in the country. They wanted to get their children out of the city and into the country. During one Christmas, when the electricity had been out in their valley for several days, they decided to take the whole family to a movie theater. When they returned home, their home was a huge bonfire and they lost every single thing they owned. A huge power surge had started the fire. The mother said she has never been able to shed a tear over it because it was NOTHING compared to what her mother-in-law had endured. Some of the children spoke and said that things are nothing compared to human beings and all of them were safe.

Perspective is everything. I am sure they mourned the loss of their pictures, all their musical instruments, etc. but they knew all of those weren't all that important in the long run. Human life is what is important.

I have never lost a child, but my parents lost my brother and Lori, you don't get over it. You move on, but you never get over losing a child or children.

As for the fire, a fire in my opinion is still a tragedy. Yes, it is different from losing loved ones. But losing a house is still tragic because of memories and the safety of home. Guess what Lori, my aunt and uncle lost a house to a fire in the early 70s and my uncle weeped as he saw his house burn down. He was glad his kids were out of the house, but it hurt him and my aunt because they built that house.

[Koala]

Lori's post today: :angry-banghead:

The smart is not strong with this one....

[dairyfreelife]

I was annoyed with Lori's posting. She fangirls over the Willis family.

I have never lost a child, but my parents lost my brother and Lori, you don't get over it. You move on, but you never get over losing a child or children.

As for the fire, a fire in my opinion is still a tragedy. Yes, it is different from losing loved ones. But losing a house is still tragic because of memories and the safety of home. Guess what Lori, my aunt and uncle lost a house to a fire in the early 70s and my uncle weeped as he saw his house burn down. He was glad his kids were out of the house, but it hurt him and my aunt because they built that house.

Agreed. You don't. Grandparents lost a child suddenly and even after 50 years, still clearly pains my grandmother (grandfather passed away six years ago). They moved on with life, had another child and already had other children that needed them, but getting over it? Never have and never will. Time heals wounds. That doesn't mean it won't leave scars.

[Koala]

This is a woman who said she would have rather her children had never been born than to have them not embrace her religious beliefs. I don't know what they call it when you don't have the capacity to love, but I don't think Lori does.

She has written before about having a lack of emotion, never feeling "in love" with anyone (not so subtle dig a Ken), and being a taker, not a giver. I have never seen her write about anyone- her children, her grandchildren, Ken with any semblance of love. Her children are just vehicles to continue her own religious beliefs. Her grandchildren are just there to keep her entertained (when she sees them being force fed or denied food). Ken is just a walking, breathing paycheck. I'd venture that I love my dog more than Lori cares for Ken.

I think this is why she labors under the delusion that she must "teach" women to love their children. It has never occurred to her that most mothers are absolutely overflowing with love for their babies.

I may be one of those over the top gushy moms, but I felt like the heavens had opened up for us the day our babies were born. All I could think, is what on earth did I do to deserve this precious baby? (This is not saying I didn't have some postpartum issues. I did. Not really depression, but I was crazy protective and essentially wanted the world to just leave us alone for the first 2 years or so

:shock: .... anyway).

When I think of my husband, his income is the last thing that comes to my mind. He has been my best friend since I was 16 years old and we've been together so long I can't imagine a single minute of my life without him in it. What his employer deposits into our bank account every 2 weeks means less than nothing to me in the grand scheme of things. He makes me laugh. He's the person I can't wait to tell what I heard on the news or on Fb...

I don't have grandkids yet, but when I do I'll tell you one thing- the person who mistreats them will have me to deal with.

There is something off about Lori. Aside from not being very smart (and willfully ignorant much of the time), there's just something missing.

[polecat]

This is a woman who said she would have rather her children had never been born than to have them not embrace her religious beliefs. I don't know what they call it when you don't have the capacity to love, but I don't think Lori does.

She has written before about having a lack of emotion, never feeling "in love" with anyone (not so subtle dig a Ken), and being a taker, not a giver. I have never seen her write about anyone- her children, her grandchildren, Ken with any semblance of love. Her children are just vehicles to continue her own religious beliefs. Her grandchildren are just there to keep her entertained (when she sees them being force fed or denied food). Ken is just a walking, breathing paycheck. I'd venture that I love my dog more than Lori cares for Ken.

I think this is why she labors under the delusion that she must "teach" women to love their children. It has never occurred to her that most mothers are absolutely overflowing with love for their babies.

I may be one of those over the top gushy moms, but I felt like the heavens had opened up for us the day our babies were born. All I could think, is what on earth did I do to deserve this precious baby? (This is not saying I didn't have some postpartum issues. I did. Not really depression, but I was crazy protective and essentially wanted the world to just leave us alone for the first 2 years or so

:shock: .... anyway).

When I think of my husband, his income is the last thing that comes to my mind. He has been my best friend since I was 16 years old and we've been together so long I can't imagine a single minute of my life without him in it. What his employer deposits into our bank account every 2 weeks means less than nothing to me in the grand scheme of things. He makes me laugh. He's the person I can't wait to tell what I heard on the news or on Fb...

I don't have grandkids yet, but when I do I'll tell you one thing- the person who mistreats them will have me to deal with.

There is something off about Lori. Aside from not being very smart (and willfully ignorant much of the time), there's just something missing.

Some people simply aren't very expressive by nature. That's one thing, and it's not right or wrong -- it's simply who they are. I don't think this is Lori's deal. It isn't so much that she doesn't express her feelings but that she genuinely seems to lack them, as you've mentioned. She doesn't understand love or other positive emotions. But at the same time, she seems to be utterly brimming with nasty emotions (or maybe just nasty actions).

[Koala]

She reminds me of a Harriet and Nellie Olsen combo.

[lilwriter85]

Today's posting. She has posted similar views/things in the past. I just get irritated with how she tries put all women in a box and same with all men in one box. Lori, doesn't come off as sensitive or emotional in many ways. Now, people don't need to be overly sensitive. But, Lori has said some pretty shitty things on her blog over the years and she has lost readers because of some of the stuff she has said.

Dennis Prager asked this question on his radio show, "If you could change some male qualities, what would you change?" Of course, women jumped in and said that men's sex drive is too high, they always have to fix things instead of just listening, and they aren't sensitive and emotional enough like women.

"Their sex drive is too high." Yes, men have ten times the testosterone levels that women have. They need this to protect and provide for their families. They also need this to have desire for women and to want to have children. Of course, these traits can be abused but they can be used in many good and productive ways also.

"They always have to fix things, instead of just listening." Thankfully, men are wired to fix things or we wouldn't have homes, freeways, cars, airplanes, buildings, etc. God created them to fix things. It's how they are built so it would be good for us to stop trying to change our husband. If you tell him something wanting him to just listen and he wants to fix it, understand this is in his God-given nature.

"They aren't sensitive and emotional enough like women." You think you want your husband to be more like a woman, but you really don't. It's a good thing that men are stronger emotionally and not as sensitive. They have to go out into the world and work hard, dealing with all sorts of people and making big decisions. They need to be able to decide things without emotions and feelings, which women do far too often. God gave women sensitive, emotional makeups since most women should be home all day tending to the home and children.

As I type this, I know many women will hate these words and be offended. We are not men and we never will be. God created both of us differently for different and important roles in life. The specific qualities He gave to both male and female are very good when used within the boundaries of these roles. Chaos reigns, as we are seeing in our society, when men and women leave their God-given roles to pursue the qualities of the opposite sex. Human beings will NEVER be able to improve upon God's ways, so stop fighting them, begin walking in the Spirit and in obedience to God's amazing calling on your life! Now, go and love on that masculine man of yours.

God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them...And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

Genesis 1:27 and 2:18

[lilwriter85]

She reminds me of a Harriet and Nellie Olsen combo.

Yeah, me too. But Harriet was an ebil women running that mercantile.

[jerkit]

Lori is entirely capable of positive thoughts and emotions. And in her mind, people live in tiny boxes that she can control. Anything outside of those tiny boxes either doesn't exist or she just refuses to talk about.

[dairyfreelife]

Lori is entirely capable of positive thoughts and emotions. And in her mind, people live in tiny boxes that she can control. Anything outside of those tiny boxes either doesn't exist or she just refuses to talk about.

No, those outside the boxes are exceptions.