Jana and Stephen 17: Married August 15

[Hera]

On 8/16/2024 at 9:35 PM, AussieKrissy said:

I can’t believe how normal Janna’s wedding looks. Higher number of bridesmaids but not really. Professionally done hair and makeup. Proper venue. So far from the other duggar shit shows. 

I thought this, too. 

[CanadianMamam]

2 hours ago, FunDieDumDum said:

 

It looks to have easily been the classiest Duggar wedding until now. Jana and Stephen looked very happy and seem to be quite comfortable with each other, kind of like JD and Abbie. This is no doubt due to their relative maturity compared to the Duggar kids who married very young.

 

I agree. I wonder if after John got married, that became Jana’s goal, that she wanted that kind of comfortable companisionship and I think she has found that with Stephen and they do look truly happy together. Maybe they aren’t gushing over the top about their love story, but they both look so happy and comfortable together and that is nice to see, especially for fundies.

If Stephen waited for Jana to be ready, then I have a tremendous amount of respect for him. He is an attractive man, I am sure he could have found a willing fundie bride, but I like that he was willing to wait for the one he wanted, for her to be ready. C

[fluffernutter]

13 hours ago, Audrey2 said:

I've said this before but it's been a while. 

I neither married nor had children, but if I had if they were old enough to meet the person that they thought they wanted to marry I would strongly encourage them to take a trip to a city that they are not familiar with and figure out how to drive around that city and that they need to go camping together for a week, preferably in a tent. What they choose to do from a physical standpoint is not my business.

I see both of these conditions as stressful situations that you really get to see how your chosen person reacts when things are less than perfect.

My oldest daughter got engaged shortly before her and her now-husband and her were planning a huge trip. They drove from the east coast all the way to Alaska to take a job as sea kayak instructors for 6 months. They lived out of his truck during the drive there and back, and it was so cold their peanut butter was frozen solid one morning. Then when they got there, they lived in a shed-sized structure. I told her when they got back, yep, he's the one! 💕 I'm not sure my husband and me would survive that kind of adventure together, and we've been together 35 years. 🤣

[Baba O'Riley]

12 minutes ago, CanadianMamam said:

If Stephen waited for Jana to be ready, then I have a tremendous amount of respect for him. He is an attractive man, I am sure he could have found a willing fundie bride, but I like that he was willing to wait for the one he wanted, for her to be ready. C

Also, he could have looked for a younger early 20s bride to provide him with a huge brood of children if his desire was to "be fruitful and multiply", so I think this must be true love on his part. 

[CanadianMamam]

1 hour ago, Baba O'Riley said:

Also, he could have looked for a younger early 20s bride to provide him with a huge brood of children if his desire was to "be fruitful and multiply", so I think this must be true love on his part. 

I agree. I think he is probably a catch in the fundie world. He has an actual job, a house, and is conventionally attractive. So the fact that he waited to marry shows he was waiting for the right one and it really seems like he waited for Jana in particular, that he was waiting for her to be ready, to show her that she could trust him and it makes me cautiously optimistic about their future. I mean their beliefs are still awful, but they are two people who got a chance to really know each other and know themselves and will likely only have a few children, so I call it a win and I think they have the chance to be very happy. 

[Tatar-tot]

On 8/17/2024 at 3:14 AM, livinginthelight said:

Wait.... Why is JimBob walking behind Michelle as she's being seated? He's the father of the bride. Did he not walk Jana down the aisle? Do I dare hope that, at 34 years old, she doesn't see herself as property to be given away?

That is rather odd.  

[Baba O'Riley]

The People article was updated to include more photos.  Such as Michelle holding the train of Jana's gown, Stephen carrying her out of the chapel, etc.  For some unknown reason, I am unable to post the link.  ETA: Thanks to fish_ca for posting the link below. 

Edited August 18 by Baba O'Riley

[fish_ca]

15 minutes ago, Baba O'Riley said:

The People article was updated to include more photos.  Such as Michelle holding the train of Jana's gown, Stephen carrying her out of the chapel, etc.  For some unknown reason, I am unable to post the link. 

https://people.com/photos-jana-duggar-wedding-to-stephen-wissmann-exclusive-8696866

There you go  Jimbulb is also there unfortuantely...

Edited August 18 by fish_ca

[caitrona]

Really, JimBob couldn't have buttoned his suit coat to walk her down? 🙄

[Kiki03910]

3 hours ago, fluffernutter said:

My oldest daughter got engaged shortly before her and her now-husband and her were planning a huge trip. They drove from the east coast all the way to Alaska to take a job as sea kayak instructors for 6 months. They lived out of his truck during the drive there and back, and it was so cold their peanut butter was frozen solid one morning. Then when they got there, they lived in a shed-sized structure. I told her when they got back, yep, he's the one! 💕 I'm not sure my husband and me would survive that kind of adventure together, and we've been together 35 years. 🤣

I love my bf but I would have boobytrapped the truck before a month was up.

[HereticHick]

17 hours ago, Audrey2 said:

I've said this before but it's been a while. 

I neither married nor had children, but if I had if they were old enough to meet the person that they thought they wanted to marry I would strongly encourage them to take a trip to a city that they are not familiar with and figure out how to drive around that city and that they need to go camping together for a week, preferably in a tent. What they choose to do from a physical standpoint is not my business.

When Mr. Hick and I were dating one of our first big arguments was how to build a campfire! 😄 Turns out we had very different and very strongly held views on the topic!!

[AussieKrissy]

3 hours ago, fish_ca said:

https://people.com/photos-jana-duggar-wedding-to-stephen-wissmann-exclusive-8696866

There you go  Jimbulb is also there unfortuantely...

Um all I can think with the carrying down the aisle pic is...dam that floor looks shiny AKA slippery. I would have been in the audience shutting my eyes freaking out that they were going to go arse over head

and the lifting up kissing pic ahhh little bit of spice for a fundy. No akward first kiss for them lol  

[QuiverFullofBooks]

3 hours ago, Tatar-tot said:

That is rather odd.  

That photo was from (I’m pretty sure) Jed and Katey’s wedding. At any rate, they were the parents of the groom. The confusion came from Michelle wearing the same dress to both.

[metheglyn]

11 minutes ago, AussieKrissy said:

Um all I can think with the carrying down the aisle pic is...dam that floor looks shiny AKA slippery. I would have been in the audience shutting my eyes freaking out that they were going to go arse over head

and the lifting up kissing pic ahhh little bit of spice for a fundy. No akward first kiss for them lol 

My first thought about that particular picture is that he looked *really* close to stepping on her dress, which likely would have pitched both of them onto the floor.

Beyond that, it really did look very normal and classy all around. I'm most surprised that they went with an indoor venue that isn't a church! And they don't seem to have added any obviously religious decorations (aside from the reported unit candle, which is also not inherently religious).

[Meggo]

35 minutes ago, AussieKrissy said:

Um all I can think with the carrying down the aisle pic is...dam that floor looks shiny AKA slippery. I would have been in the audience shutting my eyes freaking out that they were going to go arse over head

and the lifting up kissing pic ahhh little bit of spice for a fundy. No akward first kiss for them lol  

Yeah that didn’t look like a “we just figured out how to kiss!” photo. 

[Hera]

Late to the discussion, but I think the most interesting thing about Jana saying she had a hard time with trusting someone with her heart (paraphrase) is the, well, why?  In theory, she’s 34 with limited dating experience and no major romantic heartbreaks standing in her way. 
 

To me it’s the same theme Jill and Jinger have stated more directly: fundie women live under a constant umbrella of fear, stress, anxiety and despair. They know they’re at the mercy of the men around them. And, Jana and her sisters have been told those men will protect them, but, they didn’t. That’s terrifying.

You have no skills. No income. No autonomy and you’re at the mercy of whatever man you marry. Josh cheated on his wife and nothing happened to him even though the so-called godly men around him knew it.
 

Josh molested Jana’s sisters with impunity even though the so-called godly men around him knew ir. He was protected even after it came out. But his victims were paraded out on TV to excuse him because Dad ordered it.
 

Ir wasn’t until Josh downloaded sick CSM and the Evil Government got involved that someone stopped him. And still, he had his dad protecting him. Everyone else be dammed.
 

And then there’s the shit “godly” members outside of their family did that was brushed aside.

I believe Jana picked someone she was comfortable with and trusted wouldn’t turn on her once the vows were said. And I do think she had a very honest conversation with herself, knowing she could be single and fine. I hope it’s a good match for her. 

[GuineaPigCourtship]

I think they look genuinely happy in the photos - more than that, Stephen looks like he won the lottery when he's looking at her in them.  No snark from me today.  I hope they are able to go forth and live a happy life together and raise children (if they have any) in a better way than Jana was raised.

[Audrey2]

I would really be curious to hear their story from Stephen's perspective. Had he liked her a long time even before they started dating the first time but because she was a few years older didn't think that he had a chance? Had he tried getting to know other fundie maidens when he was younger but he still had a crush on an older woman?

[Smee]

11 hours ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I have a feeling planes were involved. 

But that would mean one of them would have to know a pilot, and that seems unlikely.

[Smee]

19 minutes ago, Audrey2 said:

I would really be curious to hear their story from Stephen's perspective. Had he liked her a long time even before they started dating the first time but because she was a few years older didn't think that he had a chance? Had he tried getting to know other fundie maidens when he was younger but he still had a crush on an older woman?

Me too. Looking at how happy they look in those photos, the kisses, the way they look at each other, and Jana's story of him waiting and respecting her, it's easy to imagine a romantic storyline and mutual friendship. But they're total strangers to us, and it's certainly still possible that he's a narcissistic arse who other fundie girls ran from so he carefully stalked Jana and lovebombed her until she gave in thinking he was the bees knees and she didn't deserve anyone, let alone him. Just coz he's conventionally handsome doesn't mean he's kind. However, for Jana's sake, I hope he is as decent as they come and she has a marriage filled with mutual respect and shared interests and a manageable number of kids (if any).

The inner dynamics of the Duggar household continues to fascinate me, because you've got Josh, who grew up to be a criminal and married a woman who will not leave despite it being in the best interests of her many children, followed by JD and Jana who had what look like the healthiest attitudes towards dating and marriage, followed by Jill who seemed to race Jessa down the aisle and into motherhood as soon as she could, only to leave the cult and write a tell-all. Then Jessa with her pastor husband and five blessings, continuing down the road of least resistance to her parents' teachings. I wonder about all the crossover dynamics and how they influenced each others' choices as they all navigated adulthood after their weird and very public upbringing.

[Coconut Flan]

32 minutes ago, Smee said:

But that would mean one of them would have to know a pilot, and that seems unlikely.

That was sarcasm, right?

[Vivi_music]

3 hours ago, GuineaPigCourtship said:

I think they look genuinely happy in the photos - more than that, Stephen looks like he won the lottery when he's looking at her in them.  No snark from me today.  I hope they are able to go forth and live a happy life together and raise children (if they have any) in a better way than Jana was raised.

Just the fact that they'll certainly have less than JB and Michelle did will make up for a way better childhood than Jana ever had. I'm sure her and Stephen will certainly try for kids.

Contrary to what some people have said, I do not think Jana waited for her younger siblings to be grown up (in order to protect them), nor do I think she was willingly single. I think she adheres to most of the fundie values she grew up with. Not saying she didn't relax on some legalistic purity rules (clothing for example), but overall, I think she'll still follow the main fundie lifestyle. Which means having kids, probably homeschooling, Jana being a SAHM and Stephen being the main breadwinner, etc.

But just the fact they'll probably never reach double digit kids will mean less poverty than when Jana was young, also less likely for any future daughter to become a sister-mom and better chance of having more attentive parents in general. I'm pretty sure they'll teach their kids some harmful beliefs, but at this point, if any of these kids can live in a household where they are not fighting to finish their plates, nor having to raise their other siblings, well, it's a good thing in my book. (And I'm not even talking about the trauma of having Josh has a brother, and enabler parents on top of that, which I hope no Duggar grand-kid will ever have - well, I'm scared for the M-kids but yeah..) (I know, the bar is on the floor)

 

[Bluebirdbluebell]

10 hours ago, Baba O'Riley said:

Also, he could have looked for a younger early 20s bride to provide him with a huge brood of children if his desire was to "be fruitful and multiply", so I think this must be true love on his part. 

She's 34 and a daughter of Michelle. 

She probably won't have 10+ kids, but I doubt they'll be childfree. You never know, but if she's fertile like her mother she could have 5-9 kids, especially if she keeps having babies into her 40s.  Five kids is small compared to their respective families, but still a large family where I'm from. 

Of course being a daughter of Michelle, she's more likely to have twins...

[AussieKrissy]

53 minutes ago, Smee said:

Me too. Looking at how happy they look in those photos, the kisses, the way they look at each other, and Jana's story of him waiting and respecting her, it's easy to imagine a romantic storyline and mutual friendship. But they're total strangers to us, and it's certainly still possible that he's a narcissistic arse who other fundie girls ran from so he carefully stalked Jana and lovebombed her until she gave in thinking he was the bees knees and she didn't deserve anyone, let alone him. Just coz he's conventionally handsome doesn't mean he's kind. However, for Jana's sake, I hope he is as decent as they come and she has a marriage filled with mutual respect and shared interests and a manageable number of kids (if any).

The inner dynamics of the Duggar household continues to fascinate me, because you've got Josh, who grew up to be a criminal and married a woman who will not leave despite it being in the best interests of her many children, followed by JD and Jana who had what look like the healthiest attitudes towards dating and marriage, followed by Jill who seemed to race Jessa down the aisle and into motherhood as soon as she could, only to leave the cult and write a tell-all. Then Jessa with her pastor husband and five blessings, continuing down the road of least resistance to her parents' teachings. I wonder about all the crossover dynamics and how they influenced each others' choices as they all navigated adulthood after their weird and very public upbringing.

did you just describe Kelton Balka ? lol

47 minutes ago, Coconut Flan said:

That was sarcasm, right?

I dunno I did hear a rumour that her twin is a pilot, but I am not sure if that is true 

[marmalade]

Even worse is the rumor that her husband is a pilot!